Monday, December 20, 2010

Reviewing last year

I was just on my way home from Whole Foods and was thinking about how I feel this year vs. last year. It's really amazing to me that I have even progressed farther from where I was a year ago!!

Last year, I was well. I was infection-free and living normally. I had just gotten certified as a pilates instructor and finished a demanding training. It was difficult for me from many perspectives. One, it was physically demanding. We had to put in a lot of hours working out so we learned the material in our own bodies. You can't very well teach pilates when you can't do pilates! Two, it was demanding, given all the memory problems I had, to learn the material for the written test. I had so much trouble with word recall and with my short term memory, that learning the new terms was quite challenging.

I remember at my test out, I didn't even know the names of the 7 other people who went through training with me for four months. I remember looking at one of them at test out and thinking, "Who is that, have I ever seen her before?" So, even though I was feeling better, my brain still had a lot of healing to do.

A year later, I still feel great! It's my brain that has healed over the past year. I knew I needed to work on some kind of puzzles or something to work my brain, to exercise it. Teaching pilates has been a huge help in this regard on many levels. When someone has to come to class, I have to recognize their face and remember their name. When I was sick, I didn't even recognize my own neighbor!!! At my test out, I didn't even recognize all my classmates!!! Now, if person comes to one class or sometimes it takes two classes, I can remember who they are! HUGE improvement!! In the beginning it would take two months to remember their name!

Another challenging aspect of teaching is remembering the choreography of the class. There is a basic structure, but when you teach, you have to remember the order of that structure, what exercises you've selected, all while you're counting how many repetitions they've done in your head while you're verbally giving them cues and physically adjusting them when needed. There is a LOT going on at one time. For someone who had trouble taking a thought and putting it into words, this was a huge challenge for me. I had to write down my choreography for a couple months. Now I do it all in my head. I can teach the same class for a week with no notes. An amazing change for me.

I started playing Scrabble (actually, "Words for Friends") on my iPhone recently. My mom is one of those Scrabble buffs who does crossword puzzles in pen because she could write a dictionary she knows so many words. Great idea playing her, LOL!! The first time she beat me by about a hundred points. Then only by 40 points. Last game, SIX points!!! I was ahead at one point, but she had a "Q" as one of her last letters. Yes, "qi" is a word, so she got ahead with that. Anyway, that is how fast I notice my brain healing, going from being happy to find words to play to being a formidable opponent.

Yesterday, we watched a movie that I swear I have never even heard of before. All my family tells me I have watched it before. Obviously it was when I was sick because I have no recollection of it whatsoever. Back when I was sick, I'd have to have my family pause movies every 15 minutes or so to tell me what was happening because I'd keep forgetting. Now I can remember what a movie is about after it's over. I watched that movie yesterday, followed it, and still remember it today. That's progress.

I also find that I want to visit with people. I used to tend to be a little to myself, but now I'm back to the social person I used to be. I really need to work on meeting people over the next year. We moved here when I was sick, and I've only been well for a year, so even though I've lived here five years now, I don't really know that many people. I need, and finally want, to work on building friendships.

Physically the changes aren't so noticeable from last year. I have been working on detox, detox, and detox!!!! Recently, I've been working on skin brushing, as I mentioned in my last post. I'm still working on it and probably always will. It's been amazing. One of my clients even said today she could see a difference around my eyes. I said the same thing yesterday. I have a face brush, so have been brushing my face. My eyes are less puffy and noticeably tighter.

Today is my monthly Bionic 880 day, and I plan on using homeopathics to detoxify heavy metals and chemicals. The first time I did that one it threw me for a loop, but I'm not quite that toxic anymore.

I always know when I hit toxins I haven't hit before because I get a bit tired. Right now I'm having some really annoying shortness of breath. It's been driving me crazy. Other than the shortness of breath, I am feeling great and feeling better all the time ... still. Since healing reactions always occur in reverse order of the way the symptoms came on, I'm starting to think this shortness of breath might be a healing reaction. It was my first symptom I went to the doctor for. I must finally be healing enough to heal that last thing.

If it's not, I'll have to look for other causes. It was my first symptom and is the only one still lingering even though I am negative now for babesia. It's not dramatic like the air hunger for babesia was. Could be bathroom mold .... we're having our bathroom redone this spring, so I'll find out soon enough.

That's my review of my last year. I am actually quite shocked that it is possible to feel better than I did a year ago, but I do!!! For those of you with Lyme, KEEP FIGHTING!!!

Tuesday, December 14, 2010

Skin brushing

I haven't focused on any new methods of detoxification lately. In the past I've used many forms of detox - parasites, liver cleanses, saunas, heavy metal detox, coffee enemas, herbs, etc.

I have owned a skin brush for many years. I have seldom used it. I have never been drawn to it.

The most recent detoxification I have used has been chemtox and metox with the Bionic 880. I really feel these two helped me let go of chemicals left over from all the drugs I had to take during treatment. I don't necessarily think I'm finished with these, but I'm ready to move on.

I've detoxed my liver, kidneys, and GI tract. What I haven't detoxed is my skin. I began using my skin brush about a week ago. At first it felt prickly, but the second or third day it felt good. I have a good quality brush made from natural materials. You don't just want to get any old brush out there. It needs to be natural.

There are also many ways to do it. I start with either my hands or my feet. I try to go over each area 7 times with long strokes moving towards my heart. I start away from my heart, and move closer. There are many sites out there with detailed instructions, what I really want to share is my experience with it.

My skin is feeling much softer already. I am relatively thin and am in good shape from doing pilates. However, I have a layer of cellulite that I have read can be from toxins. This makes sense because it got so much worse when I was sick even though I remained thin. Exercise and diet doesn't touch this.

The skin is one of the major detoxification organs, so needs to be kept working well. Mine never really has worked well. It's dry and scaly. There are areas that are thicker/rougher than others. The skin brushing is helping. My skin is already feeling softer.

I have been skin brushing, then taking an hour sauna (I get in when it's cool), then showering.

I am having the biggest healing healing crisis I've had in a long time!! I'm feeling achey and tired. I'm not liking it at all. I had a reaction to the chemtox and metox, but it was short-lived. I just felt like my body dumped the toxins into my system, I felt like I had taken a few Vicodin or something. Then it went away. This is lingering. I feel "puffy" in the morning when I wake up. My sinuses are filling up, but washing out easily with the neti pot. And I feel very toxic.

I didn't expect this reaction at all. I guess I should have. I have known for a long time that my skin is holding a lot of toxins. In iridology, the study of the iris, a scurf rim, or a dark rim around the outside of the iris, is indicative of the skin holding toxins. I have always had this rim. It became somewhat smaller with all my previous detoxification, but has never gone away and is still rather thick. So, I knew the toxins were there. Now I'm going after them.

What's interesting to me is that after I skin brush, I can hear my stomach make squirting noises like it does with a lymphatic massage. My massage therapist has told me that noise is the lymph dumping into the intestines. I also had diarrhea type stools the first few days into this, not like when you're sick, but sort of "ashey". I have started the Dr. Natura cleanse to help keep my bowels clear through this treatment. I'll stop the Dr. Natura when I'm through this little healing crisis.

I have reached new toxins with the skin brushing and saunas. I am hoping this helps me to reach a new level of health. I have been feeling really well prior to now, but still catch every bug my kids bring home. I am hoping that this makes my immune system even stronger. I'll keep you posted.

** update ** I am starting to feel better and my skin is getting even softer. It was just a couple days that it was making me feel bad, I'm a little fatigued, but not as bad as before. I'm sure the Dr. Natura cleanse is helping move toxins out.

Wednesday, December 8, 2010

My Lyme Disease is not the IDSA Lyme Disease - sixgoofykids

Recently the Chicago Tribune published a disappointing article titled "Chronic Lyme disease: A dubious diagnosis." From the beginning of the article you can tell that the writer is biased. It is not a balanced piece of investigative reporting at all. Not only that, many facts are entirely wrong, or irrelevant. Here's the article: Tribune article

For example, what relevance does an obscure treatment for ALS using deer antler therapy have to Lyme Disease?

Also, the article brings up the point that the number of reported cases in Illinois shows Lyme Disease is rare in that state. However, the article doesn't mention that the CDC itself says that Lyme Disease is grossly under-reported. The article doesn't mention that many doctors refuse to report the disease. I personally met the CDC criteria for reporting with 8 positive bands on my IgG Western Blot, yet my case was not reported in Ohio. When I called the CDC to tell them my case wasn't reported, they told me that if I wasn't happy with my doctor, to get a new doctor. They had no concern whatsoever that my case wasn't reported.

The article continues its inaccuracy and biased reporting when mentioning the settlement between the CT attorney general Richard Blumenthal and the IDSA. The article mentions that the IDSA determined that the treatment guidelines for Lyme Disease did not need to be rewritten. What the article leaves out is that Richard Blumenthal notified the IDSA in Feb. 2010 that he was "concerned" that they were using "improper voting procedures" in regards to the agreement. For a detailed outline of what really happened go to this link: timeline

The point of my post here is not to refute the article point by point. I hope I have shed some light on the fact that the article is both biased and inaccurate. Not only that, it brings up the ridiculous. Hardly professional journalism.

The point of my post is to tell my Lyme story again, to tell you my personal experience from a different angle than before.

My Lyme story begins back in the early 1970's, but doesn't get really interesting until a new bite in approximately 2003, so I'll start there, though there are some good stories from earlier, like the doctor who told me I drank too much. Huh? Or the doctor who said I still felt bad from the flu I had had 6 months earlier. Huh? Or then there's the one who just considered me to be a hypochondriac even though I always refused pharmaceutical drugs. How exactly can you be a hypochondriac that doesn't want medicine? Or there's the one who said it was a rare but normal reaction to have very severe joint pain after having been treated for bronchitis with antibiotics. Okay, you get the idea.

Basically, I learned to live with it. I got lots of rest. I exercised. I got sunshine and fresh air. I was the health nut of the family and knew all about herbs. I maintained my health with much effort.

In 2003 my husband pulled a tick off me that I had picked up in the woods in Spencer, IN a few hours earlier. I did not have a bullseye rash that I know of. The tick was behind my ear in my hair, so I most likely wouldn't have seen it if I did have one. I did not get the fever or the flu-like symptoms frequently mentioned with contracting Lyme Disease. Lyme wasn't even a thought that crossed my mind.

I don't remember what year each of these symptoms cropped up, but I remember the first one I went to the doctor for was a severe shortness of breath. My sister has asthma, so the docs wanted to rule that out. I went through extensive testing and the doctor finally told me, "You are just hyperventilating."

You've seen in the movies where someone has to breath into a bag? Oh yes, this happened to me several times. I eventually learned how to simulate the bag without having the bag so I could quit embarrassing myself in public. As far as my "regular" breathing, you know how when you breathe in at some point you stop breathing in and start breathing out? Well, for me, I never reached that point where I started breathing out. I just wanted to breathe in. Of course, at some point you can no longer breathe in anymore but have to breathe out, so I would, but I never had what felt like a full breath of air. This was constant.

I also remember my first sweat. It was winter and I was standing there in the kitchen and all of a sudden felt like I was 120 degrees. I took my sweater off, I had a t-shirt on underneath. I opened the window, it was about 10 degrees outside, and sat next to the window. I could not cool off. I also started waking up at night absolutely drenched. When I say drenched, I mean my nightshirt would be completely wet, as would the bed and the pillow. My hair would be completely wet. Again, to compare to the movies, have you ever seen a malaria patient in the movies? That's what I would be like at least one time per night, usually more. My ob/gyn said this was a normal premenopausal symptom. I was 39.

The next symptoms I remember were the GI symptoms. I had a lot of stomach pain after I ate. I dropped from 137 to 123 pounds in three months (I'm 5'8"). I began eating what my friend on Weight Watchers estimated to be at least 3500-4000 calories per day. At this point I started having severe fatigue and weakness. I could hardly hold my head up.

I remember going to the GI doctor and sitting there in the examination room talking to him with my head resting on the wall behind me because I was too weak to hold it up. I told him my GI symptoms - constant watery diarrhea 7-10 times per day, weight loss, muscle weakness, some joint pain, hair loss, but I left out the sweating and breathing difficulties, because, remember, I was told they were normal.

We both thought it might be celiac disease. I had both an upper endoscopy with a biopsy and a colonoscopy. Nothing was wrong except I had a bit of acid reflux. He said, "Maybe it's your gallbladder." Huh? Based on what symptoms? I ran, never went back.

I went gluten-free anyway. I temporarily felt somewhat better on a gluten-free diet. This was the first of my food intolerances. Eventually, I could only eat a few food items without severe, lying-on-the-couch-crying stomach pain. At that later time, I mostly lived on smoothies. I could also eat Vans gluten-free waffles and fried eggs. The only other item I could eat was a fudge I'd make from almond butter, coconut oil, and cocoa nibs.

To summarize my symptoms at this point: air hunger, night sweats, fatigue, muscle aches, joint pain, hair loss, diarrhea, weight loss, food intolerances, stomach pain, and weakness.

I had other symptoms start up at various times that I haven't yet mentioned: heart palpitations, lack of appetite, disorientation, mental confusion, getting lost driving, trouble reading, trouble writing, trouble talking, word recall problems, trouble falling asleep, trouble staying asleep, rashes, bruising, TMJ disorder, ringing in the ears, floaters in eyes, light sensitivity, sound sensitivity, touch sensitivity, mood swings, rage, rib pain, allergies, alcohol intolerance, etc.

Three years after my tick bite I started seeing a holistic MD to see if she could help me. She seemed very promising. She looked over my charts, said she could do thousands of dollars worth of blood tests, but that it would be a waste. She diagnosed me with Somatization Disorder. I said, "So, you're saying this is all in my head?" She said, "No. You've had severe emotional trauma that you haven't let go of and it's causing your physical symptoms."

I started researching on my own. I knew I was not a psychological mess. I discovered Lyme Disease and thought back to that tick bite. It was an "aha" moment for me. I was too sick to call IGeneX Labs, so my husband did and they mailed me a test kit. I took it to my doctor and asked her to run the blood test. She said, "I will run the test because you have Somatization Disorder and I need to get it out of your head that you're sick, so to prove to you that you do not have Lyme Disease, I will run the test."

She ran the test, it came back with 8 positive IgG bands on the Western Blot!!!!! She still stood by her Somatization Disorder diagnosis saying the test shows that at one time I used to have Lyme Disease, but I don't anymore.

January 2007 I had my first appointment with an ILADS ( LLMD (Lyme-literate medical doctor). His nurse spent two hours with me talking about my symptoms and writing them down. He came in and spent 30 minutes with me, at least. He looked over all the information the nurse had gathered, looked over the Western Blot test results, and diagnosed me with Lyme Disease and babesia. He was shocked at how poor the previous doctor's diagnostic skills were.

He treated me for 20 months with antibiotics and antimalarials. By the time I had gotten to him three years after my bite, I was bedridden and barely opened my eyes. My husband took me to New York, and I'm not sure how he did it. He made me open my eyes to look at New York City as we were driving through. That's how bad it had gotten. I could not walk without my husband's help. I cried a lot from the pain. I never wanted to eat.

I became more functional on the antibiotics and antimalarials. I had severe ups and downs, but never as bad as I had been when I was first diagnosed. At first I got worse, then improved from there. Anytime we tried to lower the number of drugs I was on or switch over to herbs, I would backslide significantly.

Eventually, I realized that even with ILADS care, we still don't know how to cure Lyme Disease once it gets chronic, we only know how to manage it. I also realized that there is much more to Lyme Disease than just borrelia. I also had babesia, which I was diagnosed with at the beginning. Later I got a bartonella diagnosis. I also got bacterial dysbiosis, fibromyalgia, and hypothyroid diagnoses.

An interesting thing happened with the bacteria dysbiosis that is worth mentioning. My LLMD put me on Cipro because I tested positive for both klebsiella and citrobacter bacteria overgrowths in the gut. I felt GREAT on the Cipro!! Not only did it help with the gut infections, but it also was hitting my as of yet undiagnosed bartonella. After Cipro, when the diarrhea was still there, the PA wanted me to try herbs rather than stay on the Cipro. She had me on several different herbs. I found an herbal combination for parasites that also hit those particular bacteria, so I took that brand. I SAW a 7 + FOOT long tapeworm that had died in my gut and come out in the toilet. I don't know its full length as I refused to go digging to see what was there, that 7 ft. is just what I saw. I also passed later, on other herbs, over 30 roundworms that were 10-15 inches long!!!! It's distressing to think the GI doctor missed this HUGE problem in my gut!! As soon as the worms passed, I gained 10 pounds and started eating half as much food. My stomach cramps and diarrhea also went away. My hair started growing back. I stopped having weird movement in my abdomen.

After 20 months of the ILADS treatment, I read about an alternative treatment using light and homeopathics in Germany performed by an MD over there. I decided I had nothing to lose because it looked like I was most likely a case that would need maintenance antibiotics until a cure was developed. I also discovered at this point that my Select Comfort bed was full of mold.

We immediately got rid of the bed (eventually got our money back). I started detoxing the mold and felt the worst I had felt in a long time. I was unable to take any medications at all. This went on for a couple weeks and was right before I was due to go to Germany. Between crashing from coming off the medication and from detoxing the mold, I didn't even know if I'd be strong enough to make the trip.

I did muster the strength, but spent the first two days over there in bed except to go to the doctor. I came home three weeks later 50% improved and continued to improve over the next year. I worked on detoxification, rebuilding minerals I was deficient in, killing parasites, rebuilding my gut, and continuing the light treatment at home. Nine months later, I was completely symptom-free. Ends up, it wasn't all in my head. I was sick with bacterial, malarial, and parasitical infections.

Today I am one year and four months healthy. I only take one prescription - Armour Thyroid. I also take iron, minerals, vitamins, and a few herbs - resveratrol, CoQ10, and ALA. A year ago I got certified to teach pilates, and when one of my clients or one of the other teachers finds out that I was very sick just two years ago, they are shocked.

Remember that I mentioned that I had Lyme Disease since the early 1970's? Well, all the little things I lived with for over 30 years - fibromyalgia, fatigue - are now gone, too.

My Lyme Disease was not IDSA Lyme Disease, check it out for yourself - IDSA Lyme Disease. Do YOU think that is what I had? My disease is better described as Multiple Chronic Infectious Disease Syndrome, the term that my LLMD prefers to use.

Like I said at the beginning of this post, the Chicago Tribune article is poorly researched and biased. It is an inaccurate representation of chronic Lyme patients and the doctors who treat us.

Monday, November 8, 2010

Nettles and pictures

Last August I had terrible hay fever and a friend told me about nettles. I dragged my feet with ordering them and eventually the hay fever was gone, so I didn't.

This last bout with anemia that I've written about before really was causing fatigue and shortness of breath. I was only supplementing with my regular dosage of iron and trying to eat iron-rich foods, but I was progressing very slowly. My friend reminded me of nettles again and told me it was full of minerals including iron.

I finally bought some. I've been making nettle infusions by taking a handful of nettles, putting them into a one quart french press, then filling it with hot water. I leave it sit overnight, then press in the morning.

It doesn't taste that great, so I add just a little honey. I find that they are really helping!! I'm feeling a lot better. I am seldom breathless and I have a bit more energy. I have also started taking two iron tablets, so that probably has something to do with it, but I know that the nettles are helping because shortly after I drink it, I have more energy. It's a great pick-me-up!

Google "nettle infusion benefits" ..... there are so many conditions this herb will help.

The other thing I've been meaning to write about is my reaction to pictures. As you know I used EFT/tapping, which has a free manual you can download, to overcome some emotional trauma.

Recently my mom has posted pictures of my childhood. Some of these pictures reminded me of things I had forgotten. I have tapped and tapped to overcome trauma that has to do with the people in the pictures, but not for these specific incidents. I'm going to be incorporating tapping again now that I have been reminded. As it is now, there are pictures I can't bear to look at.

Dr. H in NY believes emotional trauma is important to treat in healing, and I've found that to be true in my case. As you know, I'm healthy and living normally, but you also know I still am working on detox and I obviously still have imbalances since I'm still supplementing iron, KPU, and thyroid. Maybe I'll always have to supplement those, but maybe someday my body will function better on its own. :)

I'll keep you posted on how it goes with the nettles and tapping.

Friday, October 15, 2010

Sunday, October 10, 2010


I have supplemented iron for over 25 years now. Even on the iron, my hemoglobin will range from 11-13. I've always needed it.

When I went to Whole Foods (not the best place for supps, but the most convenient) they were out of my Blood Builder, so I bought Raw Iron by Garden of Life, a company I really like. I took it for about six weeks.

During this time I started getting short of breath and fatigued. Normally my first anemic symptom is restless legs, but I have been good about supplementing my other minerals, so maybe this has changed. Plus, I typically get restless legs when I'm traveling or over-tired and I've had neither of those problems. Since I didn't get restless legs, I didn't think of anemia as possibly causing my symptoms.

Back when I had babesia, drinking some tonic water would help with the air hunger and fatigue. So, worried my shortness of breath and fatigue might be babesia coming back out, I bought tonic water. No help whatsoever.

I want to say, I was not worried about it being babesia. I know I have the tools to get rid of it if it was .... but I am glad it wasn't.

The other day I had a revelation, ANEMIA!!! I bought my Blood Builder yesterday. I am craving it like it's chocolate or something! LOL! I feel better a good part of the day, but by this time of night (8 PM), I'm getting short of breath again. I'll keep you posted, but this seems to be the fix. I'm already less fatigued.

I believe that the anemia is probably from the KPU (tendency toward iron-deficiency anemia is on some of the screening questionnaires) . From what I can tell from my reading about KPU, we don't know the underlying cause, so all I can do is manage it by taking the minerals.

I'd still like to fix the underlying cause of the low thyroid ..... but as it is, I'm really happy that the only script I'm on is my Armour Thyroid. My adrenal fatigue symptoms have really improved tremendously, so perhaps over time my thyroid gland will, too.

From now on, I must work on being sure I buy a new bottle of Blood Builder well before I'm out so that I have time to order it online!!

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

Bugs going around .... ALREADY!!!!

Two days ago I had to pick up my daughter from band practice because she came down with the stomach "flu". She stayed home from school yesterday and lied around all day (except for band practice because there's a contest this weekend, and if she missed practice, she wouldn't be able to march).

I had signs of an upset stomach that night, but felt good enough to go to a pilates class the next day. As the day progressed, my stomach became more upset. By the time I was spending a little too much time in the bathroom, it was too late to get a sub for my pilates classes so I taught them. Today, I feel sluggish, but I'm sitting upright blogging, so not bad. I'm getting my haircut later.

So, I'm pretty excited that my immune system is able to handle this bug and that I breezed through it more easily than my "healthiest" daughter!!! I *used* to be the one who caught everything ten times worse than everyone else!!! All signs that I'm truly getting healthier all the time.

I did load up on the vitamin D and used my Mercola tanning bed the day she came home sick .... and I took extra vitamin C as well.

I just hope I don't continue to catch EVERYTHING my kids catch. This is the second time they've been sick and the second time I've caught it from them. Ugh.

Tuesday, September 14, 2010

And .... two years

I just had my one year anniversary of wellness, and this month is my two year anniversary off antibiotics!!! In fact, the only prescription I'm still on is Armour Thyroid. I am hoping that my hormones continue to heal, I have seen signs that my adrenals are stronger, so I hope to be able to be off Armour some day. That is my goal.

This is the first year hayfever season has bothered me since my health declined 7 years ago. That may or may not be significant ..... it's bothering a lot of people this year, seems to be a bad year, probably due to the lack of rain.

I have been treating with the Bionic for this. So has one of my daughters (not the one who had Lyme). I set a bowl of water outside for 24 hours to gather pollen. I put the water in the vial and treated. I went right into full strength because I've not had any adverse affects from treatment for so long. It hit both of us hard!!!

We were both very tired and she had a headache. Neither of us had the runny noses and sneezing. I'm still using my neti pot twice a day, but it's not as bad as it was. I have two more treatments to go. Yesterday I even sat outside for a half hour and didn't sneeze once .... a week ago, I sneezed about 50 times in 20 minutes (continual sneezing) .... I had to have my husband drive me home and I missed my son's football game.

Monday, August 30, 2010

Years lost?

I wish I could say what made me think of writing about this, but it's very personal to a friend of mine. Nonetheless, it got me thinking about my own loss of years. It's easy for me to think, "Wow, six years, a significant portion of that time significantly disabled, fighting the fight of my life" and think it's not fair and that it was time lost.

I missed so much of my kids' lives because my time was spent in bed, or if it was a good day, on the couch. The kids would come in to me and with my limited attention and limited understanding of what was being said to me, I would hear about how everyone else was living their lives. I was not seeing football games my son played in, not seeing softball games, not going to school events ..... it even got to the point that my youngest wouldn't even tell me about the events at her school because she didn't want me to feel bad for missing them. I finally convinced her to tell me because sometimes I could push myself to get up and go.

Not only was I missing out, but I also felt horrible. So much pain. It's indescribable. If you've ever had the flu, multiply that by 10. Then add all the other symptoms on top of that. This kind of ongoing pain makes your mind crazy. It makes you think you'll take any way out, which is likely why the suicide rate is so high with Lyme patients.

It's easy to think "Why me?" and "It's not fair." The answer to the first question is, "Why not you?" And it isn't fair, who says it's supposed to be?

Back to my first point, that it would be easy for me to think it was time lost. It wasn't time lost. Not at all. Yes, it was spent differently than I would have chosen, for sure. Yes, it was miserable, and yes, I told God more than once, "Take me or make me better."

However, we each have our own paths in life. We each have our own obstacles. The person I become is the person who has lived through these experiences and has learned from them. I am a different person than I was before I was ill. I understand better the meaning of life and the meaning of death in a way that a healthy person never can. This is my experience and unique to me. If I hadn't gone through this experience, I wouldn't be the person I am today and I happen to *like* the person I am today.

My kids got through my illness just fine. They are also better people for it. They had to run the household with the help of their dad when I was sick. They all have practical lessons they've learned .... they can all get themselves off to school in the morning on time, wash their clothes, clean the house, cook dinner, and do the dishes. They have learned to be independent little people, very capable of handling what comes their way.

My husband was way too busy for one person, but what goes for me goes for him, too. He would be a different person today without what we experienced together.

I am very, very happy that I am well today, but I do not look back over my illness with regret. The experiences of those six years may not have been the experiences I would have chosen to have, but they are experiences in their own right, and these experiences make me who I am. I have more humility, patience, compassion, and love for others than I would have had otherwise.

Not years lost.

Friday, August 20, 2010


Hi again! This month marks one year that I have been well!! An exciting milestone for me!

One year ago I started fermenting and went into training to teach pilates.

Today I am feeling better than ever, still ferment though not as much, and have been teaching lots of pilates. Just yesterday I taught a pilates mat class to a man half my age. I was talking through all the exercises, got up to help him a couple times, and he was the one who couldn't keep up with ME!!

I am living a normal life again with no signs of ever having been sick.

I am eating well. I don't even like processed food, so I do eat what I make from scratch, but not because I was sick, rather because I like it better and I like how I feel when I eat well. Even my hubby and kids now prefer good food. We went to a pitch-in and the kids couldn't believe what others ate .... they thought it was disgusting!! Eating well is not a sacrifice. :)

I do enjoy lattes, but make them at home with non-homogenized, lightly pasteurized (170 degrees, 20 seconds) milk. I also enjoy chips, salsa and guacamole, but eat good, organic, chips with a good organic garlic cilantro salsa and guacamole made with real ingredients and no fillers. So, I do eat "fun" foods, but eat them in a healthy way.

I am teaching 10-15 hours per week. Just yesterday I taught 6 hours. When teaching reformer, I don't do the workout, but it is still a lot of exercise because I constantly demo the work and am moving around the whole time. My biggest problem is I don't drink enough when I teach and end up with a bladder infection which is easily reversed by flushing it out by drinking a lot of water.

My husband and I just bought a Norwalk Juicer. WOW!!! It's SO much better than our old juicer. I LOVE the juice! The best juice I've ever had. I feel that it's helping me with detox as I had somewhat of a detox reaction when I started drinking it. Also, it's nice to be able to eat some raw veggies, which I still have a bit of a problem digesting (small side salads are fine).

As for supplements, I change things around once in a while. I always take Depyrrol, copper, and oil of evening primrose for KPU. I also always take iron, magnesium, and Armour Thyroid. Others I like and take often are alpha lipoic acid, resveratrol, CoQ10, multiple vitamin with plenty of B vitamins, and Kyolic garlic.

Sometimes turmeric for inflammation, but that's usually when I've overdone the Pilates. Sometimes cilantro. I go in spurts with the cilantro. It's good for heavy metals. I also put cilantro in our juice.

Currently I'm doing a follow up round of Humaworm. It's good to do a parasite cleanse once or twice per year and it was time. Last time, about a year ago I think, I felt horrible and had to stop a week early likely due to the detox herbs as I was still toxic despite being better from Lyme. This year I feel just like my husband does on it, no problem at all. I felt a little sluggish on day 3, 4 and 5, but otherwise have been fine.

I still take 5 HTP. I fall asleep easily at night now and stay asleep all night. I get very tired in the evening, which is weird for me because I have never been one to get tired at night. I guess my adrenals have always been affected by Lyme as that's a symptom of sluggish adrenals. I get up easily in the morning and feel refreshed. I'm also using a progesterone cream from day 14 of my cycle until the end. I think this has been a help in restoring my ability to sleep well.

I think that's about it! Thanks for reading and I hope all of you are doing well!!

Sunday, May 16, 2010


Sorry I haven't updated lately. I've been really busy!! I'm teaching pilates 7-15 times per week! I'm also taking 4-5 classes per week. I've started riding my new bike! Yesterday we went on a 25 mile bike ride and I was less tired than hubby afterward!! Boy, I slept well last night!!

Supplements - Depyrrol, magnesium, iron, copper, resveratrol, garlic, B Complex and oil of evening primrose. I am also still on 1 grain Armour thyroid and take Xymogen Adrenal Essence. I take DIMension 3 by Xymogen for estrogen dominance because both parents have had cancer (it's anti-cancer). I use progesterone cream the second half of my cycle at night to see if it will help with sleep, and it seems to.

Currently using Dr. Natura cleanse again. It was just time for a refresher of it.

Reading The Body Ecology Diet. Interesting book. I don't have candida, but I'm going to try to incorporate some of the concepts to try to continue healing my gut.

I'm sauna-ing several days per week (4-5) and using coffee enemas to help detox what's stirred up by the saunas (2-3 times per week).

So, feeling great! Working on detox and gut healing. Eating lots of fermented foods (kefir and kombucha).

Thursday, March 18, 2010

Back update

My chiropractor says I have more mobility and only has me coming in 2 times per week instead of 3. I am in less pain than I was, too. Sometimes the pain is completely gone. When I get up in the morning is still the most difficult, but I used to hardly be able to get out of bed, then had to lean on the bathroom counter to brush my teeth or wash my hands, now I do not.

I'm really able to tell in Pilates on the reformer that my hips are back to where the should be. It's really amazing!

One other thing, it seems that I also have a UTI. When my back started hurting, I started putting off using the bathroom because it hurt my back. I'm treating the UTI with colloidal silver and some kidney support. After a few days, my back pain is totally gone. I don't *think* this is the original origin of the pain, though it's possible. It would be highly coincidental that I had such drastic changes in my body at the exact time of the UTI.

Tuesday, March 9, 2010

My back hurts!

Good news and bad news .... my lower back is killing me! Has been for two weeks. Here's what happened ....

I went to the chiropractor like usual. My lower back really moved, he even commented on how well it moved. I left and found I had more mobility in my hips than I had before. It felt so different .... good different.

When I was sick, my pain was left-sided. I am left-handed, but my left side had become significantly weaker than my right. Pilates really showed me that when I did the arm work with the pulleys we use. The work on my right side was easy, but it felt like my left side had two or three times the weight yet both arms were working from the same resistance.

Pilates on the reformer (pilates apparatus) does not allow you to compensate for one side being weaker because the focus is on form and wrong form is really accentuated by the reformer. The only answer was fewer reps or less weight to allow the left side to catch up.

When I would lie down on the reformer my right hip was higher than my left. Because we work the body out evenly with pilates, I had to think about holding my right hip down, which would make it feel like my left butt cheek wasn't even on the carriage bed.

This focus on evening out the body has, well, evened out my body! My left is as strong as my right.

My massage therapist and chiropractor had told me when I first came in my body was twisted. That right hip came forward, so lying on my back, my right hip came up, or lying on my stomach, the left side of my back was higher than the right.

So, back to the chiro appt. I came home amazed at my mobility and how much better it felt. Then, wham! A couple hours later, PAIN!

I noticed that my right hip no longer comes up on the reformer, it's even with the left. I went for a massage and he said it was the first time my left back was not raised. The massage therapist's theory is that the adjustment finally made my lumbar spine and hips move to the right place. My muscles are now not happy about this movement .... they are stretched in different ways and work in different ways, thus pain.

I told my chiropractor the massage therapist's theory and he agreed that it sounded like a possibility. He said that if that were true, then the movement caused strain on my back muscles and we are treating my back as if I had strained it in injury. I'm getting adjusted three times per week. He's using ultrasound on it and I'm using my Bionic 880 on it as well.

The really funny thing is ..... I can still do pilates!! It is an exercise so protective of the lower back that it's no problem and I actually feel BETTER after having done it. I can also during this time FEEL the exercises that are hard on the lower back. Knowing this information will help me be a better instructor because I will never include those movements in my classes.

The really, really funny thing is, when I do pilates, I do the exercises with great form and look strong, however, when I am finished and need to get off the reformer, I look like a cripple!!

Wednesday, February 17, 2010

update, stopped neurotransmitters

I never adjusted to the full dose of neurotransmitters. I felt tired all the time, and who wouldn't on 900 mg of 5 HTP daily?! I looked at the benefits - no more spotting and steady basal temps, and wondered what was causing those changes. Tired all the time and no improvement at all in sleep seems hardly worth it.

Then I started thinking .... when I changed to natural thyroid he put me on a whole grain. That is more than I was getting previously, I believe. Perhaps the improvement in the hormones were more due to thyroid changes than neurotransmitters? Could be.

I stopped taking them yesterday, except for the nighttime dose because I was taking that dosage of 5 HTP previously to help with sleep and it was working as well as these pricey neurotransmitters. I was dizzy and tired all day yesterday. I'm somewhat improved today and have more energy today than I've had in a while.

I also started reading about thyroid and spotting. I found something interesting. Estrogen and thyroid can counteract each other. In estrogen dominance or low progesterone states, it's common to spot several days prior to menstruation. I guess it's more likely that it was the increased thyroid dosage that helped my hormonal problems than that it was the neurotransmitters.

I dug out an old book called "What Your Doctor May Not Tell You About Premenopause." It said that low progesterone/estrogen dominance can cause insomnia! It also said that it can mimic hypothyroid, that thyroid patients who test borderline (like me) can be helped by using progesterone cream because in reality it's too much estrogen causing the problem rather than too little thyroid. The book says that many of their patients have been able to stop thyroid meds after using the cream for several months.

I ordered some cream to see if it helps. I also started taking DIM for estrogen dominance. I'll keep you posted. But for the record, the neurotransmitters weren't a help for me. Considering my age (almost 47), it makes more sense that it's low progesterone the more I read.

I know it's crazy to be trying things on my own, but at least the things I've tried on my own haven't set me back like these neurotransmitters did, in fact. most of them have helped. I'd rather do the research and go with what I feel works rather than using something that my doctor feels works and makes him lots of money .... it's not like he tested me, he did the same thing I did, went on a hunch .... not that I'm encouraging you to ignore your doctor ..... I'm not, rather I'm encouraging you to research what your doctor recommends.

Saturday, January 23, 2010

Jan. update

Hi friends! Just a quick update ....

I have ramped up to the full dosage of Neuroreplete. I have seen a few good results from it. For one, my basal temperatures are more consistent. They used to jump around a lot, now they are more consistent from day to day. Secondly, I used to spot several days before menstruation, that has stopped completely. I thought it was due to age (I'm 46), apparently it was not. I believe I'm sleeping more soundly, but that's hard to tell, I'll let you know once I'm on the full dosage a couple weeks.

I also got muscle tested again, last time was last April and I was still testing positive for babs and bart .... and oddly enough lice?? Remember that?! Well, all three of those are clear now! For the first time I tested clear of all Lyme and coinfections!! Woohoo!!

My organs also tested as clear, but still had some heavy metal toxicity. Also tested positive for a fungal infection. I have a rash on my forehead that I had figured out was fungal, so I am guessing the rash is what showed up.

It seems I have regained my health!! I am currently taking KPU, iron, magnesium, Neuroreplete, and thyroid. I also take resveratrol, a good antioxidant.

To work on toxicity as it's an ongoing problem for everyone, I am taking saunas twice per week and doing coffee enemas the next morning. I notice when I wake up the morning after a sauna, my lymph system feels a bit sluggish. My massage therapist also noticed this during my last massage. I believe the saunas are pulling out a lot of toxins. I only go in for 30 min, any longer and I don't feel good. I plan on doing this protocol for a while .... until I feel I am no longer getting a benefit.

I hope this finds all of you well. Thanks for reading.